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Review of Big Baz’s Australia

May 28th 2007 00:10
Big Tommy
Big Tommy





I know, I know filming hasn’t even finished but my mate on the spot tells me it’s goin’ to be a big Aussie western bonanza. Every dinki-di who’s been to NIDA or close is in it – YES THAT’s RIGHT, even Bill Hunter.

Rusty sailed up on Anzac Day for a game of two-up at the local. He texted Big Baz and congratulated him on the set. Said if Bazzy Balmain needed any tips he’d be only too happy to oblige.
Well I have two tips.
Tip one, change the name. You call a film Australia and you’re only asking for trouble. Your target market is 20,000. I can hear those Yankee-do’s going;

Ain’t that the place they speak German – that place ol’ Adolf was born. Is that what this picture is bout?

Second, if you’re going for a cavalcade of Aussie flavour why not get some real go-go.
Get Tommy Raudonikis in for a cameo.
Here’s the scene.

Hugh Jackman rides up to the homestead. Nicole Kidman is standing on the rap-round veranda, slightly leaning on the post. There is some cleavage.

Kidman:
Nice horse Mister.
Jackman:
I raised it from a baby, it was an orphan.
Kidman:
I kinda thought it might be.
Jackman dismounts, Raudonikis rolls out from under the veranda.
Raudonikis: (pointing to Jackman)
Hey Hubcap, you can’t park that pile of dingo dinner there, it’s a loadin’ zone.

Kidman:
Hush now Daddy, this here is a distinguished guest.


I’m thinking it’s the only way to sell this to the Yanks.


Until next time and happy film-making.

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1 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by JohnDoe

June 2nd 2007 00:54
Very funny post, I love it.

Good work Fish.

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