Sim1Happy Birthday!
June 7th 2010 17:31
It’s Fish on Film’s first birthday. Happy birthday, dear readers!
Well, actually, ok, it’s probably not your birthday today and in fact, it’s not Fish on Film’s first birthday, either. So that’s utter rubbish.
But it was a year ago that I took over this blog and so, I guess, what I am trying to say is ‘Happy anniversary to me!’
I’d like to celebrate with you, my faithful readers, all things film- rubbish or otherwise. So to get the party started let's play a game. Let’s play ‘My Favourite’. If you need the rules explained, please step away from this blog. And if you are about to protest that in some categories, I list more than one, please remember that I am a woman and it is part of my job description to change my mind every five minutes.
Top Three Overrated Flicks Between 2005 and 2008
Slumdog Millionaire
Brokeback Mountain (the abbridged, 28-hour version)
Marley & Me
Prime Example of People Who Can’t Act
Bette Midler & Barbara Hershey in ‘Beaches’
Cinematic Crush It’s Probably Best Not To Admit To
Zachary Quinto
Favourite Quotes
1. Now listen here, you mullet. Why don't you just light your tampon and blow your box apart? Because it's the only bang you're ever gonna get, sweetheart!
(The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert)
2. I'm pleased to meet you. My name's Nick.
Nick? What does that mean?
Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it while he was shaving.
(Top Secret)
3. You stole fizzy lifting drinks! You bumped into the ceiling which now has to be washed and sterilized, so you get nothing! You lose! Good day, sir!
(Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory)
Bestest Film Love Song(s)
1. On the Street Where You Live, My Fair Lady (They don’t make ‘em like that anymore.)
2. Suddenly Seymour, Little Shop of Horrors
Five Movie Stars You’d Invite to Dinner
Michael Biehn- Because I have had a crush on the man since I was 12 years old, when I saw him in the TV thriller ‘Deadly Intentions’, in the days before he beefed up and became James Cameron’s bestest buddy
Keanu Reeves- Because he’s gorgeous and perhaps he can bring his band and entertain all of us. If not, I reckon he’d be good to talk to about things like parallel universes and aliens living amongst us. Please note, that my spellchecker did NOT pick up the word ‘universes’ so it’s clearly a truth universally acknowledged that there is more than one. What do you think, Keanu?
Zachary Quinto- Because I need to find out if he just looks like an arrogant prick or whether he actually is one. And I need to work out what it is about him that I find so bloody, intriguingly, unfathomably attractive. He’s not even my type! I also need to ask him if he’s gay, or what.
Johnny Depp- To tell him that he is overrated. I’d ask him for an autograph for my little sister first, though.
Kiefer Sutherland- No dinner is complete without Jack Bauer and I am hoping he might propose to me.
I hear some of you shake your pretty heads in disbelief, whilst murmuring the words ‘Shallow’ and ‘Superficial’ to yourselves. But let’s be serious for one minute! You will never get the opportunity to invite 5 actors for dinner ever again. It’s probably because you can’t cook. Are you trying to tell me, you’d invite Mike Myers to discuss makes of chest wigs? No, of course not. You, too, would surround yourself with your favourite eye candy. So shut up.
Movie Star You’d Invite for Desert
Gerard Butler
Head Scratchers
1. I Heart Huckabees- I was going to review this movie for you, but I didn’t even know where to start.
2.The compulsion to film sequels to everything and then making it into trilogies before shooting parts 4 and 5. Why?
Tear Jerker
Forest Gump’s speech at Jenny Gump’s grave
Most Unnecessary Works Ever to Appear on the Big Screen
It is important to remember, that some movies actually serve as a warning of what not to do on film, who not to cast, what story lines to never air etc. Some films are so bad, they are funny. And then there’s the just plain unnecessary. And that’s what this category is all about.
1. I Know Where Shaun of The Dead Got Drunk Last Year- What’s with all this spoof crap? Weren’t the Scream films bad enough??
2. Animations. Happy Lion Age Feet Flushed Down the Ratatouille With A Heap of Fucking Dalmations Hoping To Find A Moronic Clownfish.
You get the idea....
Favourite Film-Drinking Game
S1M.0Ne
The rules are simple: every time someone says ‘Simone’, you down a shot. I have no idea how this film ends.....
Films you have seen twenty times or more (and therefore can recite off by heart)
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Dirty Dancing
Classics You Know You Should Have Seen, But Never Have And Probably Never Will
1. The Sound of Music (I have absolutely no interest in seeing it. Ever.)
2. The Godfather Trilogy (Bet it’s nowhere near as good as Goodfellas or Gangster Number One or Mickey Blue Eyes)
3. Rocky 1-17 (I cannot think of anything more grotesque than Silvester Stallone)
Plot Devised By a Genius
Face: Off
Guilty Pleasures
1. Dirty Dancing- a classic
2. La Boum-French teenage flick, starring a 13-year old Sophie Marceau, it’s the European equivalent to Ferret Bueller’s Day Out and other assorted 1980’s shambolics
3. Timothy Dalton as James Bond- My favourite Bond ever.
(And no, I don’t care what you have to say about that.)
Thanks for reading Fish on Film for the past year!
Lots of love,
Sim1 x
Well, actually, ok, it’s probably not your birthday today and in fact, it’s not Fish on Film’s first birthday, either. So that’s utter rubbish.
But it was a year ago that I took over this blog and so, I guess, what I am trying to say is ‘Happy anniversary to me!’
I’d like to celebrate with you, my faithful readers, all things film- rubbish or otherwise. So to get the party started let's play a game. Let’s play ‘My Favourite’. If you need the rules explained, please step away from this blog. And if you are about to protest that in some categories, I list more than one, please remember that I am a woman and it is part of my job description to change my mind every five minutes.
Top Three Overrated Flicks Between 2005 and 2008
Slumdog Millionaire
Brokeback Mountain (the abbridged, 28-hour version)
Marley & Me
Prime Example of People Who Can’t Act
Bette Midler & Barbara Hershey in ‘Beaches’
Cinematic Crush It’s Probably Best Not To Admit To
Zachary Quinto
Favourite Quotes
1. Now listen here, you mullet. Why don't you just light your tampon and blow your box apart? Because it's the only bang you're ever gonna get, sweetheart!
(The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert)
2. I'm pleased to meet you. My name's Nick.
Nick? What does that mean?
Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it while he was shaving.
(Top Secret)
3. You stole fizzy lifting drinks! You bumped into the ceiling which now has to be washed and sterilized, so you get nothing! You lose! Good day, sir!
(Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory)
Bestest Film Love Song(s)
1. On the Street Where You Live, My Fair Lady (They don’t make ‘em like that anymore.)
2. Suddenly Seymour, Little Shop of Horrors
Five Movie Stars You’d Invite to Dinner
Michael Biehn- Because I have had a crush on the man since I was 12 years old, when I saw him in the TV thriller ‘Deadly Intentions’, in the days before he beefed up and became James Cameron’s bestest buddy
Keanu Reeves- Because he’s gorgeous and perhaps he can bring his band and entertain all of us. If not, I reckon he’d be good to talk to about things like parallel universes and aliens living amongst us. Please note, that my spellchecker did NOT pick up the word ‘universes’ so it’s clearly a truth universally acknowledged that there is more than one. What do you think, Keanu?
Zachary Quinto- Because I need to find out if he just looks like an arrogant prick or whether he actually is one. And I need to work out what it is about him that I find so bloody, intriguingly, unfathomably attractive. He’s not even my type! I also need to ask him if he’s gay, or what.
Johnny Depp- To tell him that he is overrated. I’d ask him for an autograph for my little sister first, though.
Kiefer Sutherland- No dinner is complete without Jack Bauer and I am hoping he might propose to me.
I hear some of you shake your pretty heads in disbelief, whilst murmuring the words ‘Shallow’ and ‘Superficial’ to yourselves. But let’s be serious for one minute! You will never get the opportunity to invite 5 actors for dinner ever again. It’s probably because you can’t cook. Are you trying to tell me, you’d invite Mike Myers to discuss makes of chest wigs? No, of course not. You, too, would surround yourself with your favourite eye candy. So shut up.
Movie Star You’d Invite for Desert
Gerard Butler
Head Scratchers
1. I Heart Huckabees- I was going to review this movie for you, but I didn’t even know where to start.
2.The compulsion to film sequels to everything and then making it into trilogies before shooting parts 4 and 5. Why?
Tear Jerker
Forest Gump’s speech at Jenny Gump’s grave
Most Unnecessary Works Ever to Appear on the Big Screen
It is important to remember, that some movies actually serve as a warning of what not to do on film, who not to cast, what story lines to never air etc. Some films are so bad, they are funny. And then there’s the just plain unnecessary. And that’s what this category is all about.
1. I Know Where Shaun of The Dead Got Drunk Last Year- What’s with all this spoof crap? Weren’t the Scream films bad enough??
2. Animations. Happy Lion Age Feet Flushed Down the Ratatouille With A Heap of Fucking Dalmations Hoping To Find A Moronic Clownfish.
You get the idea....
Favourite Film-Drinking Game
S1M.0Ne
The rules are simple: every time someone says ‘Simone’, you down a shot. I have no idea how this film ends.....
Films you have seen twenty times or more (and therefore can recite off by heart)
The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Dirty Dancing
Classics You Know You Should Have Seen, But Never Have And Probably Never Will
1. The Sound of Music (I have absolutely no interest in seeing it. Ever.)
2. The Godfather Trilogy (Bet it’s nowhere near as good as Goodfellas or Gangster Number One or Mickey Blue Eyes)
3. Rocky 1-17 (I cannot think of anything more grotesque than Silvester Stallone)
Plot Devised By a Genius
Face: Off
Guilty Pleasures
1. Dirty Dancing- a classic
2. La Boum-French teenage flick, starring a 13-year old Sophie Marceau, it’s the European equivalent to Ferret Bueller’s Day Out and other assorted 1980’s shambolics
3. Timothy Dalton as James Bond- My favourite Bond ever.
(And no, I don’t care what you have to say about that.)
Thanks for reading Fish on Film for the past year!
Lots of love,
Sim1 x
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